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15 funniest jokes from the Edinburgh Fringe

In Humour on 26/08/2016 at 2:35 pm

In descending order
“My dad has suggested that I register for a donor card. He’s a man after my own heart” – Masai Graham
“Why is it old people say “there’s no place like home”, yet when you put them in one…” – Stuart Mitchell
“I’ve been happily married for four years – out of a total of 10” – Mark Watson
“Apparently 1 in 3 Britons are conceived in an IKEA bed which is mad because those places are really well lit” – Mark Smith
“I went to a pub quiz in Liverpool, had a few drinks so wasn’t much use. Just for a laugh I wrote The Beatles or Steven Gerrard for every answer… came second” – Will Duggan
“Brexit is a terrible name, sounds like cereal you eat when you are constipated” – Tiff Stevenson
“I often confuse Americans and Canadians. By using long words” – Gary Delaney
“Why is Henry’s wife covered in tooth marks? Because he’s Tudor” – Adele Cliff
“Don’t you hate it when people assume you’re rich because you sound posh and went to private school and have loads of money?” – Annie McGrath
“Is it possible to mistake schizophrenia for telepathy, I hear you ask” – Jordan Brookes
“Hillary Clinton has shown that any woman can be President, as long as your husband did it first” – Michelle Wolf
“I spotted a Marmite van on the motorway. It was heading yeastbound” – Roger Swift
“Back in the day, Instagram just meant a really efficient drug dealer” – Arthur Smith
“I’ll tell you what’s unnatural in the eyes of God. Contact lenses” – Zoe Lyons
“Elton John hates ordering Chinese food. Soya seems to be the hardest word” – Phil Nicol

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-37154550

TISG: Wee first ‘Elected President’/ “S’poreans only” policy backfires?

In Humour on 26/08/2016 at 5:28 am

Wee Kim Wee, not Ong Teng Cheong, was the first ‘Elected President’ of Singapore

Dr Wee Kim Wee and not Mr Ong Teng Cheong is the first Elected President of Singapore, a law don has clarified. Dr Jack Tsen-Ta Lee, Assistant Professor of Law at the Singapore Management University’s School of Law made this point in the website ‘Singapore Public Law’.

TISG

This is what Dr Jack Tsen-Ta Lee posted on Facebook

“The provision was carefully worded to avoid deeming Wee Kim Wee as having been elected, so although he exercised all the discretionary powers of an elected President, the first truly elected President was Ong Teng Cheong.” So how come the conclusion is that Wee was Singapore’s first elected President? I’m mystified!

Obviously, TISG Team, can’t understand his article weiiten in simple English. That cock meh? Need FTs to understand?

Either that or adult supervision is desperately needed.

That’s not the only recent goof.

On Augist 22 at 5.50pm  To cater to a consistently high number of readers, we are migrating to a larger server. Our website may be inaccessible for a few hours due to this. We apologise to our readers. – TISG Team

The “few hours” turned out to be at least 24 — 40hrs No articles appeared on 23 August and only late on 24 August were articles posted.

As TISG prides itself on employing only true blue S’poreans (Has no choice given its tendency towards xenophobic* articles?), maybe it got some lazy TISG-reading S’porean cybernut  to do the IT migration?

As commercially minded employers know, FTs from India are the best for low-level IT jobs like migration. Cheap and good.

Two other goofs by TISG Team.

Yup, it’s two goofs a week, for two weeks in a row.

TISG positions itself as a commercial site, not a socio-political site (Er so how come so many articles from a TRE hero, and TRELand cybernuts and sane residents?). That’s good news for TISG Team. A socio-political site would have found replacements for such goofing, careless, wanking S’poreans, assuming they were either subversives working for the PAP, not for the Cause, or that they were incompetent, lazy S’poreans.


*Aiming  “to promote feelings of ill-will and hostility between different races or classes of the population of Singapore”?

 

Experiment that failed in Japan, being tried here

In Internet, Public Administration on 28/08/2016 at 4:24 am

It’s really hard to believe that Yaacob is an RI boy, I mean RI boys are supposed to be smart, not stupid. OK, OK I know he’s Minister for Communications and Information, Minister-incharge of Muslim Affairs and Minister in charge of Cyber Security. But Minister in charge of Cyber Security, ne’s trying out something here that failed in Japan.

William Saito, a special cyber security adviser to the Japanese government, said some Japanese companies had cut internet access in the past year, usually after a breach. “They cut themselves off because they thought it was a good idea,” he said, “but then they realised they were pretty dependent on this internet thing.”

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/aug/24/singapore-to-cut-off-public-servants-from-the-internet

Let’s see if the PAP administration can succeed where the Japanese cos failed.

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